Nov 29th, 2013

Rebecca worked form 01:00 until 11:00 today, I showed up right at 10:50 with her favorite coffee drink and a blueberry scone and stood outside the employee entrance. Around 11:30 I was wondering what was going on and she finally came out. I handed her the now half empty chai tea and we headed off to Best Buy.

Rebecca, still running on adrenaline and chai tea was buzzing around the store looking for cheap dvd’s while I looked at tv’s. She bought an entire series of some show about nerds that I can’t stand. I come from a time when nerds were stuffed into lockers and wore pocket protectors, and were given wedgies,  now the cool thing is to be part of the nerd culture and its suddenly cool to be nerdy.  She had her movies and I bought a Diet Dr. Pepper, and we hit the road. 

We got to the bus stop and had to wait 25 minutes for the bus and I could see Rebecca’s energy level depleting. Once on the bus she kept doing that head-bob thing I used to always do in school until I would just give in and use my backpack as a pillow. We got home around 3 and she took a nap while I sat at the table (microwave box) and watched videos of Black Friday Fights online. I was going to let her sleep, but I knew she would wake up at 3am and be wide awake, which would cause her to do something that would wake me up. I went in to wake her up at 5 and went back to the living room, I’m fairly certain she fell back asleep.

I walked away for 3 minutes and came back and she was asleep. I went to the freezer and got an old soda bottle filled with frozen water (also known as ice in some parts of the world) and gently placed it on the back of her neck. She woke up swinging. After a few minutes of her yelling at me for waking her up, we walked to the grocery store to buy bus passes for December and get a money order to pay our rent. We stopped at a Thai restaurant for dinner and started walking home. About halfway home it started raining, but it was still a warm rain.

I decided I needed to do laundry so I washed it, and hung it up in the rain, hoping it will be dry by morning.

Nov 28th, 2013

I woke up at 9 and fooled around online while Rebecca started making lunch I called most of my family and talked to them for a while. I was forbidden from entering the kitchen

I thought i should entertain myself so I played with a ball of yarn and a laser pointer for the next 3 hours while our meal was being prepared. We ate around 1, it would have been sooner but the Cornish Game Hens took a while longer to cook than anticipated.

After we ate on our luxurious dining room table (the box our microwave came in) I did the dishes and took out the trash while Rebecca got ready to go to sleep. She had to be at work at 1 in the morning so she went to bed at 3 hoping to sleep until around 10. I had to find a way to be quiet for 7 hours and keep myself entertained. I turned our table (microwave box) on its side and set up the laptop and sat in my recliner (folding camping chair) and watched movies… for the rest of the afternoon. By about hour 2 I was bored out of my mind and wanted to do something fun.

Rebecca slept until around 7 and then woke up and was wide awake for the rest of the night. She watched a tv show about cakes on her kindle so I went back out to the living room and watched more movies. Just after midnight I walked her to the bus stop and she rode off into the darkness to work all night, and I went home and fell asleep right in the middle of the bed, sprawled out like a mid-evil king. Babies don’t sleep as well as I did last night.

Nov 27th, 2013

I woke up at 4:30 and caught the bus to work, I was there early so I went outside to watch the sunrise. Right as the training started my trainer asked to speak with me outside, I was worried that I had done something wrong but I had only forgotten to remove my eyebrow ring which is forbidden by the company uniform policy. I sheepishly apologized for my mistake and took my seat in the back of class.

We were given a printout with all the hotels in the Waikiki area, there are 5 pages worth of hotels, it is going to take me forever to figure out where all of them are. 

Around 9 we all piled in one of the mini buses and we had a guy who is about to finish training pretend to pick us up from the airport and then drop us off at specific hotels so we cold see the process. One of the girls thought she was being hilarious and kept asking the trainee all kinds of questions like “What is that building over there?” “What is that park called?” “What is that ship in the harbor called?” “What kind of tree is that?” How about that tree, what kind of tree is that one?” OOH, what about that tree?” She was laughing like a drunken hyena and I was sitting in the back wishing she would choke on her tongue so we could continue the tour in silence. 

After we were “dropped off” at our hotels, we simulated doing a pick up from pre determined hotels and went back to the airport. The hyena thought it would be funny to wait until we got on the freeway to tell the driver she had left her luggage at the hotel. The trainer explained what we should do if that situation ever were to come up and I seriously wanted to give ol’ donkey laugh a swift kick to the solar plexus.

We were done around 1 so i went home, changed and then went for a walk. Rebecca had a pie in the fridge that i was told not to touch. She made it very clear what would happen to me if the pie wasn’t in the exact same condition when she got home for work. I walked to a grocery store trying to find a single piece of pie so I could take a picture of me eating it to send her but no one sells single slices of pie. I gave up on that grocery store and walked to find a bakery but came up bust. I turned back around and walked to another grocery store and came up empty again. I did find a BBQ joint that had steak and shrimp on special for $9.99. I asked for my steak to be cooked Medium and sat down to wait. After a few moments my steak had arrived. I cut in to the delicious slab of meet and noticed it wasn’t cooked medium, not even close. I’ve seen burn victims with less charing on their skin. I decided i didn’t care and ate it in record time. It was the best steak I have had in months. I will be back, but next time I’ll ask for my steak rare and hope it doesn’t come out looking like Niki Lauda. 

I walked home and entered my walking route into the computer. I walked 3.93 miles just because I had nothing else to do. I watched a movie on the computer, and then at 9:30, I went to Macy’s to pick up Rebecca from work. I sat outside the employee entrance in the dark parking lot watching a movie on my phone, I’m sure security had to have been called on me at least twice. We took the bus home and settled in for our big day tomorrow.

Nov 26th, 2013

I woke up at 4:45 and was on the bus by 5:07. The bus is full that early but it is eerily silent. I got off the stop and was at “The Yard” by 6:00. I sat around and chatted with the other new hires. There were only 6 of us training for drivers positions.

The morning was full of more safety videos and quizzes. Great material if you need to take a nap in a hurry.

Around 11 we broke off into groups of 3 and we each took a turn driving and vocalizing all the possible dangers we saw. The van we drove was the exact same size of the ambulances I used to drive so I felt right at home.

We got back to the yard and we talked about our driving performance, my trainee had no negative feedback for me. I was hoping for a ticker tape parade or a crown or statue made in my honor, but I guess a “good job out here” would have to do for now.

After training I walked to the bus stop and got there right in time. The bus was packed and it took an hour to get home. I made lunch and then checked out the Obama Care website to find insurance.

Rebecca got home around 6 and we both zoned out on separate mobile devices until I went to bed at 8:30

Nov 25th, 2013

I woke up at 5:30 and took the bus at 6:24. I arrived at my new job over a hour early. I sat down in the food court of the Dole cannery and waited. 45 minutes later I walked upstairs and sat in the lobby as directed by the receptionist.

There were 16 of us there for orientation, only a handful were born and raised on the islands, most of us were transplants. There was another lady who was also from Seattle.

We had 2 1/2 hours of paperwork and then we finally had a break I thought my bladder was going to burst.

I got back from the break and to my excitement I learned we were about to start the sexual harassment seminar. The lady have us all 3 cards, one said “wanted” another said “unwanted” and the third one said “indifferent.” The lady read out scenarios and asked us to hold up one if the cards according to how we felt. Being a straight, white, American male, there is absolutely nothing that someone could say that would offend me.

I learned that if I fall down and hurt myself and swear, someone could claim that my words were harassment and I could get fired. If I were having a conversation with a coworker and someone walking by was offended, I could be fired. If I give someone a consensual hug, someone else who sees it could claim it was harassment and I could get fired. I ended up arguing with the HR lady about what constitutes harassment. I’m sure I made a great first impression.

I had to watch a 30 minute video on maritime security for some reason and I was free to go home at 1:30.

I took the bus home, made lunch and sat outside to read in the sun. Around 5 I started making dinner so it would be ready when Rebecca got home from work.

I have to be at the dispatch center at 6:30 tomorrow. It is the same building I tried to find on Halloween night but got lost and had to run across the freeway only to find a bus stop directly in front if the building.

Nov 24th, 2013

We woke up at 9 and Rebecca made chocolate macadamia nut pancakes and then we went to the zoo. I’ve been wanting to go to the zoo for a while and I was excited. After what seemed like hours of boring animals we finally got to the chimpanzees. They were sleeping. I tried everything to get them to do something to amuse me. I stared them in the eyes, I showed my teeth, I dragged my foot across the ground, all acts of dominance that I was hoping would elicit a response. They just stared at me and went on napping. Lucky monkeys.

The rest if the zoo was pretty cool, they had 2 tigers right next to the playground but nothing fun happened there either.

After we left, we went to that new restaurant I found and we had lunch. I only got the mild hot sauce because I start my new job tomorrow and I don’t want to be leaking lava.

We went home, changed, and then took the bus to Safeway to get groceries. We had 5 huge bags of stuff and we got to the bus stop just after the bus left. Instead of waiting 30 minutes for the next bus, we walked the mile back home.

We spent a while cleaning and tidying up then we had dinner and relaxed before going to bed.

Nov 23rd, 2013

I slept in today and it felt great. I hung out at the apartment for a while until I got bored. I took the bus to the theatre and bought tickets for a movie at 9:15. I still had 4 hours until Rebecca got off work so I went to a store and bought a shirt with sleeves. It wasn’t anything fancy, just a blue t-shirt with horizontal stripes. It’s not the best shirt that I own but I thought it made me look dapper. I went home, made lunch, changed into my new shirt and some khaki shorts and headed out the door. My first stop was Walmart to buy snacks, then I went and hung out outside Macy’s until Rebecca got off work. She took one look at my shirt and chuckled. She said I look like a skater trying to look preppy. She didn’t say I looked like a hobo so I know it’s an improvement.

We took the bus to the theatre and since I already had the tickets I thought we’d just mosey on in and sit down. There was a huge line of people who already had tickets. We stood outside in line in the freezing cold 75 degree chill for what seemed like hours. It may have only been 5 minutes, I have no sense of time now that I live here. I never know what time it is or even what day it is most of the time.

We were ushered in and we took our seats at the back if the auditorium. I opened my wasabi covered macadamia nuts and thought my sinuses were melting. We watched the new Hunger a Games movie about kids battling it out gladiator style for food. It felt weird eating snacks while kids were killing each other for a meal, but I quickly got over that feeling when I found a pack of sour patch kids in my backpack.

The movie ended around 11:45 and we walked to the bus stop and waited 30 minutes for the bus. We got home and I fell right to sleep.

Nov 22nd, 2013

I must have hit the snooze button at least 4 times this morning. When I finally woke up I had my alarm clock clenched in my hand and buried under my pillow. The bus was running early this morning so I had to be at the stop at 4:57. After a quick 5 minute ride I transferred busses and made it to the job site at 5:20. I stood across the street from the site watching the bums get woken up by the garbage trucks emptying the dumpsters on the street. I stretched my legs and back which were still sore from the last 2 days.

I spent the day moving shelving units from one end of the building to another and sweeping up dust. They were grinding the cement in one corner of the store so that kept me pretty busy. By the end of the day, I blew a black, ceramic looking snot rocket out of each nostril. I filled up the two dumpsters again, mostly with garbage bags full of cement dust which was a fine powder like substance that resembled moon dust.

I learned the contractor is based in California and they brought their entire crew to Honolulu to work on the building. They get a hotel room while they are here, and an extra $140 a week for food. After the first day there, I was wondering how there were so many Mexican workers in Hawaii. I figured that all of the ones on the island just happened to be working at the same place. Once I learned they were all from California it made a little more sense. It was nice to be able to hear and speak Spanish again.

I took the bus back to the labor ready office and collected my $55.79 and immediately walked next door to a restaurant. I ordered the firecracker shrimp and asked for them to mix in some of the garlic sauce. The guy asked if I wanted to try the “crazy hot sauce” and not one to back down from such a challenge, I accepted. It was delicious. I think it’s my new favorite restaurant. The heat was so intense my sinuses leaked dust filled mucus bubbles down the back of my throat. I know I will pay dearly for that decision tomorrow, but it was so good. Maybe next time I’ll shamefully put a skirt on and ask for the mild sauce though. My mouth and stomach can handle the heat, it’s everything else that worries me.

I went home and showered and sat on the bed to watch some shows on the computer. I nodded off for a while and had to go back and finish the episode.

Rebecca came home around 9:30 and we made plans to see a movie tomorrow after she gets off work.

Nov 21, 2013

I was up again at some dark hour. I took the 5:07 bus to a transfer point and caught another bus to the worksite. It is a department store that is set to open sometime in February. The first two floors have been gutted and they were hanging up drywall and working on the HVAC system. The 7th floor was in the finishing stages as it is office space. My job was to keep all 3 floors clean. The 7th floor is my favorite because there is little to clean but most of all because it is air conditioned. I made my way up there every couple hours. The bottom 2 floors were extremely dusty and there were pieces of drywall everywhere. By 10 am I had filled 2 dumpsters and 3 garbage cans with debris. I don’t remember eating anything out if the ordinary recently, but I had to keep waddling towards the port-a-potty 4 times during the shift. It was cramped, smelly, and extremely humid inside the poo capsule and of course it was stocked with one-ply. By the third trip I was seriously considering offering up my first born future child for 30 yards of Charmin.

Towards the end of the shift I was chastised for my sleeves not being long enough. I guess it’s an OSHA requirement. I wanted to explain that I’ve done construction in third world countries shirtless and in shorts, but I nodded emphatically and replied “yes sir” like a cowardly school boy who is being yelled at for pulling a girls pigtails.

After my shift I went to labor ready and got my $55.79 and headed home. I showered off and then laid on the bed until I had enough energy to make dinner. Rebecca and I watched the new superman movie and I was asleep by 10:30.

Nov 20th, 2013

I woke up at 4:48 and was on the bus at 5:07. I got to the labor ready office and they gave me my gear and sent me on my way to a construction site. It was dark when I got there but still very very warm. I was wearing jeans and a full sleeve safety vest with steel-toe boots, a hard hat and gloves. I was sweating before I started working. I was paired with another guy from labor ready and we spent the morning moving boards and boxes of floor tiles from one pile to another. I had a 20 minute lunch break at 10 and then spent the rest of the day sweeping the floor, and picking up broken pieces if drywall. After 9 hours I was exhausted. My body ached like I had been beaten with a pillowcase full of pudding. I took the bus back to labor ready and after all my hard work, I was awarded a check for $55.79. With my newfound wealth I skipped to the bank to deposit the check. I should have asked for an armed escort to the bank in case a band of hooligans tried to take my check.

Right as I got home a strange number appeared on my caller id. I hoped it was the president saying he wanted to raise minimum wage and then he was going to let me fly a Blackhawk helicopter. I answered and it was the neighbor upstairs that I had briefly met yesterday. She had seen my flier about the iPod that I had found in the grass and it was her daughters. I had just given up the idea of someone claiming the iPod and had started making huge plans for it. Before I took the iPod upstairs, I sat down on the floor and rocked back and forth saying my goodbyes to the iPod.

I went back to my empty apartment and shed a single tear, and then I realized I own a much better iPod with way more features. I jumped in the shower and washed all the grime off. I got dressed and put a pizza in the oven because I knew Rebecca would be home soon and she would be hungry. She came home 6 minutes before the timer went off.

I have to be back at the construction site tomorrow so I went to bed at 9.